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So, I’ve decided to write this year. Write, as in: “Don’t you dare do nothing else with your time Yheela!”

And so far, I’ve not done too shabby.

I have a Swedish YA novel which is ~51.000 words, and it so badly needs a rewrite and edits and I feel like I should give this novel a go.

Like, I put so much time and effort into it that I’d be letting myself down if I didn’t!

I’d be lying if I tell you that I’ve written on my novel every day since I decided to do this. But I be been ~writing~ every day. Actually putting words down and making stories.

Only yesterday I finished a superhero short story (and posted it on my writer’s blog, I’ll try to make this a clickety link thing). It’s a huge thing, since I have that damnable issue with finishing my stories.

Like yes, planning my stories might help me with the times when I just sit there staring at the screen. But dear god help me, it’s boring af! And if I plan a story out I often never get to the writing part anyway.

I’m the suckiest writer.

Well, I suck at making plans and sticking with them and finishing stuff and things, you know. I like my stories though, even the ones that never amount into anything.

So anyway. My plan is to rewrite the story and have it ready to send to an editor by early summer (the latest). Then I hope to have a few months to do edits and (fingers crossed) I’ll send the manuscript to publishers before the new year.

Doesn’t sound all dumb, does it? I don’t know actually. But it’s my plan and I’m sticking with it!

Yeah!

Anyhow, dinner time (writing time) and all that jazz.

I love you, like for reals.

xoxo

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Christmas has passed. We’re in these in between days that just are, that must be, before we step into the new year.

The picture is from two weeks ago. Winter wonderland. Today it’s all rain and gloom and darkness. We’ve passed the longest night by a week, but it’ll take time before we’ll notice any change.

I’m off work until school starts again, January 9th. Which is so nice. But on the other hand it’s a bit ugh to be at home with three kids that sulk about not finding friends to play with.

I get it, sitting at home isn’t very fun, at least not when you’re forced to hang out with your siblings 24/7. And a lot of families have gone away on holiday or visiting family over Christmas and New Year.

Sometimes I think we’re the only ones who have stayed at home.

I’ve slacked off on my workout routine and I’m paying for it by being in pain and feeling meh. So I went to the gym today and practically cried my way through it. I wish I could think of a way to make that whole experience fun… like reading books is fun, or having tea is fun, or watching films is fun.

Ugh.

Guess my New Years resolution will be to not be such a lazy fat ass. Which means I need to be the total opposite of what I am.

Also. I have a couple of weeks until my next skin checkup, so all the angst associated with that is bubbling up to the surface.

Fun times!

I hate feeling like this, but I honestly don’t know how to deal with it; apart from allowing myself to feel like absolute shit until the checkup’s done. The feelings won’t go away, so maybe just embrace them?

I haven’t taken many pictures of anything lately (not even selfies, which is like super weird). And I know it’s because I feel all these horrible, crying over everything, ugly feelings.

Anyhow, we’re going to town after lunch. So maybe I’ll make an effort, or something…

xoxo

…hi.

So you know. Life. Or I’m not going to blame it all on life. I’m just not very good at this blogging thing, I guess.

Autumn has been good and it’s been exceptionally rough. I think that this year’s seasonal depression thing has been worse than ever.

At the same time I’m all happy and cheerful at work, because work and feeling I have to put up a “brave front”.

Having been sloppy with my workout routine hasn’t helped either.

So I’ve been experiencing pain in my shoulder and that gives me a headache because I grind my teeth.

Fingers crossed I’ll keep it up from now on.

I’m back to writing more. September and October were full months of writing, but then I hit a wall at the end of October. I kinda think I’ve found my way back though. At least I have ideas. That’s something.

Also, I’m back playing Mass Effect Andromeda. My 2nd pt and it’s been good. It does take a while to get into the game, like a good 20h or so. But now I have all the planets and my next big move is going after the Archon.

I do plan on completing as much as possible this time round though. So it’ll be a while before I do that quest.

Anyhow. Christmas is upon us, and life goes on, and another year is soon here… and I guess that’s about it.

xoxo

img_20150327_101935This year has been hard on teenage Yheela.
So many of my musical heroes have died, along with some movie heroes too.

Is this what getting old feels like? 

I woke up this morning to the news that George Michael died yesterday.
It was only a few days ago I played his music deafeningly loud in my car.
I’ve cried this morning and I think I might cry again when hearing my favourite songs by him.
It’s almost like with Prince, I still can’t listen to all of his songs without breaking down a little.

Someone told me a couple of weeks ago that the music you listen to between ages 10 and 20 is the music you’ll listen to for the rest of your life. And I’d say it’s true. I have found a few new artists, but they do remind me of my old favourites.

On the other hand, 2016 has been very good to me too. I got a new job (although I did love my old one very much too) in my home parish and looking back I can say this autumn has been a good one.
I’ve made new friends and I’ve learnt new things. As it should be I guess. Now I have a week and a couple of days off before it all starts again.
New year, new opportunities.

Our Christmas was a quiet affair, as per usual. The horde were all happy about their gifts, the twins especially since they got phones. I’ve not seen much of them, they now spend much of their time in their rooms playing games and sending me funny texts.
We did take a walk yesterday though, my son wanted to catch a few Pokémons…

Today I’m taking them all to see ‘Sing’, I managed to book us seats at the local cinema. And if I’m quick I’ll be able to book us seats for one of the other kid’s films they’re showing during the Christmas holiday.

I’d like to go down to Gothenburg some day next week, to check out the sales and just get a change of scenery. Hubs is working though, so I don’t know if it’ll happen. I need to find a party dress for a wedding in January.
It says “dark suit”  on the invite and that means a posh dress (not too short and not floor length) and I do not have one of those. A posh dress that is, mine are all summer dresses and not posh at all.

chichiI checked a few online stores and think I found a brand I like, but looking in a store would be fun too (right now I’m liking these two, but I don’t know if they’re right).

And I’ll get to buy new shoes and jewelry and makeup and hair things and ALL THE GLITTERY STUFFS!

Also, I need to get this hair of mine sorted. Should I keep colouring it? Do I let it grow? Cut it shorter? Argh!

Maybe I ought to be happy my problems are my hair and that artists I like pass away… it’s hard to know your blessings when life meanders on as it should.

Anyway, I need to do stuffs. There’s Lego all over the kitchen from building the sets the horde got for Christmas and there’s laundry that needs folding etc etc…

I wish you all the best, these last days of 2016. ❤

xoxo

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We have winter.
Or it snowed enough last night to still be here this morning. Though it’ll melt before the day is done, because it’s not cold enough yet…

Pumpkin was so happy this morning, it’s her birthday (she’s 4 now, I cannot believe how fast time flies!) and she had wished for snow. Fingers crossed the temperature drops tonight, leaving whatever snow that hasn’t yet melted.

The other day a friend of mine made me really happy. It was such a small thing really, but to me it was wonderful.

The power of words. You can do such harm, you can bring such joy. I don’t understand why people aren’t using this for good…

Every day I see vicious and hateful words being spread and said, why? Can’t we just agree on saying good things about each other? How about we build positive connections between us, no more tearing down.

I’m still happy about what they said, it keeps giving me a warm feeling in my stomach and it’s putting a smile on my face. Isn’t this what we all want to feel? Isn’t this what we want others to feel?

Let me start, then you go do the same to someone you think might need a smile…

You are wonderful and funny and smart. Anyone would be lucky to count you as their friend.

Anyhow, things to do… and books to read (so many books to read).

xoxo

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I just love when you can buy daffodils at the store. They simply scream spring (in that silent way flowers scream anything)!
I’ll keep buying new ones whenever the old ones wither, this will go on until they stop selling bunches of daffodils at the grocery store.

I’ve also bought new shoes. Shoes are the best thing ever!

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Pretty, aren’t they! My Converse were falling apart and I had thought about getting new ones, but these Dr Martin’s called to me. Buy us, buuuuy usssss! So I did. What’s a girl to do, right?

Last Saturday I posted the last part of my Swedish short story as my Saturday Scenes. I now need to get writing again… As it is now I’ve nothing to post on Saturday (there’s stuff, but I don’t know if I want to post it).

Anyway, I’m with a youth group at Laserdome tonight. It’s almost time for them to go in and shoot at each other again.

Pew pew pew pew (⬅”lasers)…

xoxo

Last day of work this week (my kids are on school holiday this week, so I took Wednesday and Thursday off).
The plan is to hang out with the horde and just chillax, go to the library and eat cake. Well, not eat cake at the library maybe but books and cake do go very well together.
Hopefully I’ll get time to write, I’m not done with the new story yet…

Anyhow, Valentine’s Day on Saturday. Not that we really make a big deal out of it here, but I like the thought of being extra nice to people.

Why not make this whole week into a week of being extra nice. Give with your heart.

Also, I’m obsessed with this Taylor Swift song:

xoxo

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Last night as I went to bed I felt slightly dizzy. This feeling got worse when I actually lay down, the bed spinning and waves of nausea pounding my insides.
This morning seemed better, until I sat up and almost fell to the floor as the whole world started spinning… I hate when this happens. It is better now (at 3pm), but I still get dizzy spells when doing sudden movements or for no apparent reason at all.

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In an hour Princess has riding lessons, then home for a quick shower and at 6 we send the twins off to a birthday party. I took them last minute present shopping after school… I don’t like doing things last minute. *grumble.* But there hasn’t been time!

Anyhow, I need to finish my tea and go see if the kids are cleaning their rooms or not (I think not).

xoxo

ballethaikuThis month has been good so far. Snow and lots of it (as it should be)! It’s actually snowing as I blog…

The year began with me not finding it in me to write, at all. I had no ideas buzzing in my brain and I felt quite useless.

But then I had this dream: I was home alone and it wasn’t a good thing. Suddenly I had to travel, and I did. Then I woke up, the dream fading but an idea had formed, it was just a matter of letting it stew a little before giving it a go. As it is now I have over 600 words written and writing is fun again, I’ve also written a few poems and haiku and posted them on the webz.

I really wish I had more time for writing. Right now most of my energy and time is consumed by work, and family (but that’s what families do). Next week is a school holiday and I’m really going to try to make time to write.

And of course I have to play more Dragon Age Inquisition… my Elven mage is really kicking bad guy butt! Though I’m slightly disappointed in Solas, romancing him has so far been BORING!

Cullen was far more fun as you get to interact with him, as a love interest, on a whole other level… and I feel bad for NOT romancing him this time around. Stupid, I know! But he’s so goddamn CUTE!

Anyhow, I need to go go do work stuffs (dishes, copies, snack etc).

xoxo

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We’ve had snow again, but that got washed away by the rain. And it’s supposed to get lighter by the day, but I can’t see it with all clouds and rain.

I feel slightly depressed with all this wetness and darkness and non-winterness going on… and I don’t know how to get myself out of this funk.

Maybe it’ll go away by itself.

Anyhow, I finished Dragon Age Inquisition the other day. Brilliant game! I’ve now started over, but with an Elven mage this time (my first was a human warrior). Love it!

xoxo

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