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It wouldn’t be a lie to claim that autumn is here. The bright colours of summer are all muted and dark, the fields a dull gold, the trees dark green and some even a pale yellow…

There’s a musty smell in the woods, a wet and earthy tone filling my lungs with autumn air and my mind with the sads.

I feel like I’m struggling with keeping cheerful, with feeling as if there’s a point of leaving the house and interacting with others. I’ve even cut back on my time spent on social media (insane, I know!).

These emotions are going to stay for an unknown period of time. Maybe all the colours of autumn will give me strength, maybe it’ll be lighting candles in December. I don’t know.

Anyhow, life goes on. Time never stops, and all I can do is get out if bed, get out of the house and go about my business.

xoxo

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A friend of mine wished I’d write more fiction in Swedish, and I do have a story I want to finish. But it’s not looking as if I’ll write many words on it tonight, which sucks because I do know where it’s heading, I just don’t have the energy to get the words down…

I’ve only been back to work two days and I’m already really tired, the thought of having to get up early tomorrow and put “leave the house” clothes on, maybe even makeup, has me wanting to stomp my feet and scream: “I DON’T WANNA!” (like any mature adult person would do).

I’m not really blaming work for my lack of writing, not really, and I suppose I should write the short story instead of blogging. But maybe some of you will get this, this feeling of “meh” I have clinging on to me.

Today I finally had time for a fika (<– go clickety for explanation) with my good friend K. She always gets me in a good mood, she’s just one of those people that just GETS me. We have the similar sense of humour and I can talk to her about anything. Also, I can’t believe I’ve known her for 13 years already! Wow, time flies…

Anyhow, I ought to make an appointment to get an colour and cut for my hair, it’s beginning to bother me. The roots, the mess, the split ends… so I guess I’ll get to it in a month or two.  Also, another tattoo? I’ve given it much thought the last couple of weeks, maybe it’s time for it now. There might be change coming up and I need something to carry me through. I dunno.

xoxo

I can’t believe I’m going back to work on Monday.

There’s no way I’ve had my holiday already, the sun and warmth has just arrived (I was in a bikini 90% of the day yesterday)! It’s so unfair that most of the holiday got rained upon…

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Today we’re going swimming, this’ll be the first time this summer that I’ve taken the horde to the beach. They went with their dad when I was away at camp, but since then it’s not really been beach weather.

The horde has been using our little inflatable pool though, so they’ve played around with water and been happy (which is the most important thing anyway).

Anyhow, I’ve promised them the baking of cupcakes to bring to said beach, so I better get us breakfast and then set up for baking.

xoxo

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I’ve now had 4 weeks of summer holiday and if it hasn’t been raining it’s been cloudy and windy. I can’t say I’m very impressed by Swedish summer this year…

Apparently the warmth and sunshine is to come next week, but excuse me for not holding my breath.

Since this was hub’s last week of holiday I had planned to go do a few small  day trips, visiting friends and getting some me time.

Unfortunately Lady Luck hasn’t been on my or my friends side, my date yesterday injured her back and my date today had not slept at all, thus being too tired to go anywhere (it’s almost like a conspiracy, someone doesn’t want me to meet my friends!).

I’m really happy I have the interwebz though, at least my online friends have been easy to get a hold of (shoutout to my interwbz bffs, love you!).

But really… isn’t it time we invented a teleportation device to use to travel to friends living far off? I’d sure pay monies to use such a device.

On a happier note, I’ve finished my short story. The name changed a few times during writing but I ended up with: Bailey’s heart. It’ll be posted as a Saturday Scene and if my calculations are correct (hahahahaha, yeah I suck at maths) there should be enough story for five Saturdays. I even made a pretty little picture to go with.

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That’s also something I’ve been doing during these rainy and gloomy weeks of summer holiday: played with my pixrl express app (it’s available for Android and iPhone both). It’s really a photo editing app, but the art you can create there is amazing, I feel super creative when mucking about with it.

Anyhow, I’m getting really bored with my hair. I want to do something with it, but not cut it all off, or colour it crazy, or morph it into feathers. Just something slightly different ya know…

Also I added mini marshmallows to my chocolate chip cookie recipe, and OH MY GOODNESS WAS IT TASTY! I might have created a new type of drug… you have try it next time you bake cookies.

xoxo

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We went to Stockholm earlier this week, just the hubs and I. Lovely lovely days and a great concert. I don’t know when the two of us had a mini holiday together…

We saw Neal Morse band (hub’s the fan, I was just tagging along) and I had a good time too. I had a drink called “Weird At My School” which was super delish, but I wish I had written down what was in it, so I could recreate it at home.

Something rather annoying at the moment is my lack of writing.
I try to make time and open up old documents and new to find any kind of inspiration, but it eludes me…

I have written some poetry though and I’m content with how they turned out. But I’d like to get going on a short story or something. I’ll keep at it, it’s bound to come some time.

I’ve found some of my favorite books as audiobooks and have spent yesterday and today listening to “Anna and the French Kiss” by Stephanie Perkins (you should totally give it a read!).
Now at 11.30pm I’ve begun listening to “Lola and the Boy Next Door” another book by her. Lovely.

Anyhow, I might roadtrip a little next week, if all plans come together as I want them to.
Also I wouldn’t mind having 10 weeks holiday instead of 5, or not have to work at all.
I really want to write…

xoxo

2015-07-04 - 1Camp last week. I had prepared for almost a month and I still left home without stuff… good thing hubby had time to drive all the way to drop them off (he really is the best there is).

We had 7 enormous boxes filled with camp stuff, but I think we only used 1/3 of that. Which in some ways is great, but if I had known in advance our backs might have been spared a little…

Honestly,it wasn’t as bad as I had imagined it. The kids (youth) we’re happy to be there and I had only to nag them a little to get them working with fetching firewood, water and go get our supplies.

Worst thing about this whole trip were the gnats. They were EVERYWHERE and I think I have over 200 bites on my arms and legs. Ah well, guess I’m a tasty human…

It’s taken me a few days to get back on track, I don’t think I slept more than 4h/night (sleeping bags aren’t my cuppa tea). I’m so very happy that I’m now on my summer holiday, all in all I have 5 weeks of what ever the fudge I want.

There’s a trip to the zoo coming up, one trip to Stockholm and then to my parents. Hopefully I’ll be able to go visit an internet friend who’s on holiday here in Sweden (what’s 4h of driving to having to take a plane to New York). IMAG1520

Anyhow, my plan is to get back to writing, but today my brain’s a mush and I think I’ll go play some Mass Effect 1 instead. Because I bloody well can!

xoxo

IMG_20150614_152051I had planned to post more often in June, but no…
Too much going on and no energy to spend on anything but the small things.
I had to go back to my previous post to see what I talked about then…

Hospital visit went really well, she said everything looked okay and asked me if I wanted to come back in six months or if I wanted to wait a whole year.

I opted for six months, I want to feel as if someone is keeping a close eye on things (I’ll never stop believing my skin being anything other than evil and on the verge of becoming cancerous).

The brunch at my old school was nice, I got big hugs from old students and colleagues, but it did feel like things were over before anything really began… I won’t be going back there again, these were the last students I taught.
End of an era and all that. Very strange.

I now have one more week to go before summer holiday. And that week I’m spending in Tiveden national park, in a tent, cooking over fire and living rough. There’s 12 kids in ages between 11 to 17, my colleagues and I and I’m sure we’ll have a great time. All the little details are in order and there’s nothing to do other than having fun.

Anyhow, the horde and I are going to watch Back to the Future now and eat lots and lots of sweets.

xoxo

PhotoGrid_1431894501333It’s only the beginning of June, but there’s not much left of school and our everyday routines are soon changed for summer holiday ones.

Tomorrow I’m invited to the upper secondary school I taught at for 5 years (the last class I mentored is graduating) and Friday next week the twins finish first grade.

I’ve not put much thought into he graduation brunch tomorrow, mostly because I’ve been ill with tonsillitis these last four days, but also because it seemed so far off. All of a sudden I need to find something nice to wear and figure out how to do my makeup (I’ve not even looked at a mascara brush since Friday last week!).

I have an idea though, and I’ll most likely go with it. It’s only a wee graduation after all, not the Nobel Prize Banquet.

Tuesday next week I have the day off. It’s time for a check-up at the hospital and I really don’t fancy going to work after that. Even if it’s only good news I’m usually so exhausted afterwards and no fun to be around.

I am treating myself to a sushi lunch and some me time in town (I’m hardly ever in town, so that’ll be so excite too).

Anyhow, four weeks until I go on summer holiday. I’m counting the days…

xoxo

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I made new friends.

I’m rather proud of myself this evening. I finished another short story!

It has a proper ending and I can post the final scene next Saturday. Yay! There were moments when I thought I had to just leave it hanging, post the last bit without closure and hope no one would notice or mind… It really is my biggest issue, this tying everything together and saying it’s done.

My short story “Q is for?is now finished, I can post the ending next week and then focus on finding a new scene for the week after. *happy dancing in the kitchen.*

And after all the scenes have been posted for Saturday Scenes I’ll post it in its entirety on my writer’s blog Viking Girl Scribbles for everyone to read (you can go and read the previous stories and poems I’ve already posted – NAOW!)

In other news it’s little over a week until my skin cancer check-up at the hospital, the closer I get the more anxious I become. I try not to think about it, but it’s hard when I have to put tape on my face every day…

Let’s just hope and pray that they won’t find anything worth cutting this time (or if they do, hope they find two things because having 13 surgical scars on my body feels like a bad omen. LOL).

Anyway, today has been a day full of doing nothing, tomorrow we’re having a b-day party for the twins at the bowling alley. 20 something kids and heavy things… you just KNOW that’ll be great!

xoxo

DSC_0147As some of you might know I’ve been playing Dragon Age Inquisition since December and the Jaws of Hakkon (DLC) since my birthday in April. I love the game, so much. I’ve loved Dragon Age since it came out and I’ve loved every new game they’ve released (yes, even Dragon Age 2).

When I got Jaws of Hakkon I was sooo happy, there was MOAR to play and it was made for characters higher than level 20 (when the game ends your character tends to be level 20-21, or mine were). I played the DLC with my mage, a heartbroken elf (if you play the Solas romance option you’ll kinda guess what happened here) and found it exciting to find some resistance from the creatures and things that you meet in the Frostback Basin. There were many occasion where I ran away so as to not get killed (RUN AWAY is a great option to not having to reload this game, especially since I suck at saving) and at the end of the DLC most enemies were my level and a match, but not impossible. I did fear the final boss though… I mean: FINAL BOSS. *doomsday music.*

I felt that that encounter was kinda hyped by everyone you met in the game, or maybe it was all me and how I get sucked in into these things (games, books, film – I’ve even snapped at hubs after reading a very emotional passage in a book, he had done nothing, I just had ALL THE FEELS!).

Aaaanyway, there I was, all ready for the last battle (frost resistant armour all around and fire damage etc on the weaponry) and when I finally get the nerve to fight I find that it’s TWO (2!) levels beneath me and not such a big ass fight after all…

I killed it dead on the first try and that was that. So excite. Not.

I love the story line in Jaws of Hakkon: I love the area, the characters and creatures… what I don’t like is that there are Gurgut (giant lizards) with higher level than the final boss. Or maybe not Gurgut, but there are Rift demons that are. And that kinda sucks… As it is now I don’t know if I’ll be able to replay it anytime soon. Meh.

Anyhow, this is one of the craziest weeks at work (confirmation this weekend) and I feel out of energy. Guess I’ll just have to suck it up and get through it. And hope I get the energy to write, at least a little.

xoxo

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